“Kelly, I love you.”
Who knows why he said it, but I rolled my eyes at Chris, the quarterback for our ninth grade football team. He sat behind me in two classes that year, but he had most likely just come to class after spending the past four and a half of our five minutes between class making out with his girlfriend in the hallway.
Some people and their flippant approach to love, I thought. It was boys like this that turned me off. "Love" was not a word that I believed could be tossed around lightly. I was pretty sure I was an expert on love and romance. In reality, my idea of love was mostly shaped by stories like Anne of Green Gables or the Christy Miller series. No doubt, highly influenced by movies like The Man from Snowy River or Somewhere in Time as well.
Books. Movies. They sure tell pretty tales of romance. But there was one book that rocked my world more than these others. It was different. It was the true real-life love story of missionaries Jim and Elizabeth Elliott. It chronicled their passion for each other, yes. But the overriding message was their intense passion for the Lord and His call on their lives. Approaching their relationship in light of the passion they shared for God led them to choose a path in their dating relationship that was based on purity. The name of the book - Passion and Purity. The subsequent affect on my life - igniting my own passion for the Lord and affirming my own desire to seek to lead a life of purity.
In light of my quest for a life of passion and purity, all the relationships I saw forming and disintegrating around me seemed shallow. I made the decision then and there that the prerequisite for any potential dates would be that the guy would have to be good husband material.
But looking around, I didn’t see anyone at my school who met this criteria. No problem, I thought. I’m just a freshman. I’m not even allowed to date until I’m sixteen anyway. I focused my attention on school, friends, the Christian group on campus, student council and my church youth group.
The youth group that Freshman year was taking off. We had an amazing youth pastor who loved us and invested in our lives. He planned all kinds of events so it seemed like there was an endless supply of opportunities to get together. Joey and I seemed to attend all of these events.
The more I was around Joey, the more I couldn’t help but notice about him. He was a leader. He was witty and funny. He could sing. He could play the guitar. He could act. He could speak. He could even juggle, for goodness sake. But most importantly, he genuinely seemed to love the Lord.
By the time winter retreat came along, I had pretty much decided that Joey had the right material for a dating relationship. When free time rolled around one evening, I decided to go in search of Joey. I don’t know what I had in mind other than batting my eyes at him and laughing at his quick wit, but I knew I wanted to hang around him.
I had a problem though. I couldn’t find him anywhere. Finally, I stepped out onto one of the main balconies and noticed a few people hanging out. I didn’t see Joey at first, but as I turned to head back inside, I noticed two shadows at the edge of the balcony, staring off into the distance and talking. Hey! That’s what I wanted to be doing! I thought.
One shadow was Joey. The other shadow was my good friend Erin. Erin ~ the friend who was cooler, prettier and in every way more fun than me. She was getting ready to move out of town with her family. There were no previous hints from either of them that they had any feelings other than friendship toward each other, but something told me I would have been a third wheel if I tried to join them on the balcony this night.
I went inside and waited for what seemed like eternity. I may have had to force my brain to stop thinking about why the only guy I seemed to have eyes for was staring off into the distance, chatting with one of my best friends - for what felt like FOREVER. By the time Joey came back inside, I was mad at him.
